Thoughts

So, have I made any important discoveries, any wisdom to share with my readers and future self? Of course not, with a preamble like that any shared wisdom would have to be quite overarching and, well, wise sounding. I can't imagine I haven't discussed it before, but I've come to the conclusion that if it sounds wise, it's probably not. Wisdom dispensed never comes out sounding wise, it always comes out sounding plain or obvious...or wrong. And besides, wisdom is fairly relative, because at some level we make decisions about our priorities, and wisdom is only a way to live according to those priorities. Not everyone has the same priorities. Maybe in that short sentence is wisdom…disguised.

It takes a lot to be aware and accepting of that little fact. Not everyone has the same priorities. When we meet someone with different priorities, it's easy to be dismissive or condescending. "The only reason he wants X is because he doesn't yet realize that X is transient/corporeal/stupid. Y is what's truly important." There is no universal set of priorities. People will always disagree on fundamental issues, and people will always want to be understood before trying to understand...or without trying to understand.

One new tenet I've been trying to follow is odd-sounding on the first run. As a matter of fact, I was a bit dismissive when I first heard it. A friend was telling me about some personal problems, and about how her psychologist had told her "Make no decisions." I thought, “Oh God, more psycho babble. That certainly sounds reasonable.”…little known fact – my inner monologue has a Valley Girl accent. The real meaning here is not that we should stay ever undecided, but that we should avoid making statements that we choose to apply over the rest of our lives. Never make a statement that you're not willing to go back on - the stubbornness that comes from a desire to "stay true to who we are" can lead to mistakes. First of all, whatever we do defines who we are - is the worry that we might someday step outside those bounds and become someone else? We are our actions, not our thoughts or decisions. I try to think about whether a decision I've made is a decision I would make again, given the chance today. And of course…I have that chance, every day. Persistence is a virtue and a necessary component of a productive life (for most people), but only when we persist in acts of value and worth.